Off the Hoof

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I was 13 years old the last time the Philadelphia Phillies won a World Series. The next day the Sisters of St. Joseph were generous enough to let us make signs and walk up and down our block of Broad St. un-ironically singing Queen songs. It was a crisp October morning, we were World Champions, I was about to leave the confines of parochial education forever, and the future looked pretty good.

One month later Ronald Reagan was elected president.

The Phillies haven’t won a World Series since. I saw my city plunge into an abyss of despair and self-loathing. I saw our other teams come really, really close. There was even an NBA Championship in ‘83. But nothing else. We lost World Series’, Super Bowls, NBA and NHL Championships. Philadelphia isn’t about losing; it’s about having the rug pulled out from under you at the very last moment.

I live in San Francisco now, but as any of my friends will tell you, Philadelphians have an indelible stain on their souls; a distrust that anything is final until it’s actually final. Not only do we not count our chickens before they’re hatched, we’re convinced someone is about to steal our eggs. Probably family.

So as I sit here 5 hours away from a World Series victory, with our best pitcher on the mound, and 8 days from a Presidential Election, with the best candidate I’ve seen in my lifetime holding a big lead, I am utterly convinced that both will go wrong. I can’t help it.

Andrea Seabrook explored the inner psyche of what makes Philadelphians so pessimistic yesterday on All Things Considered. She even gave us a shout-out because of our “I’m Not Angry, I’m From Philly” t-shirt. The piece aired when we were up 2 games to one and you can hear how nervous the interviewees are. I can only imagine that after last night’s win they’re absolutely catatonic.

Why can’t us? Because we’re from Philadelphia.

And for the love of all that’s holy; PLEASE remember to vote next week. Unless you’re from western Pennsylvania; we were always right never to trust them.

UPDATE: Game 5 was suspended due to rain, taking our best pitcher out. God hates us. This is the best proof yet.

UPDATE: Wow. We did it! We REALLY did it.

* real fans spell it Phans.

Written by Mike Monteiro on October 27, 2008 with 6 comments |

Feedstore Summer Blowout Sale

Today the temperature in San Francisco will reach 75 degrees, which means it’s warm enough outside to wear short sleeves. In celebration of this (and also because warm weather makes us want to SLASH things) we are reducing the price of many of our fine wearables to just 10 DOLLARS!

Get your clever t-shirt soon, at these prices they’ll be going like hot cakes*.

*Or something else that sells out very quickly.

Written by katiespence on May 13, 2008 with 0 comments |

Welcome Squid Overlords

It’s a good Sunday when Dr. Oliver Sacks shows up in the NY Times wearing a t-shirt we designed.

Written by Mike Monteiro on March 11, 2008 with 0 comments |

Muni is a mess.

I’m amazed at the state our public transportation is in right now; and I say this as a survivor of the Philadelphia SEPTA system of the 70’s. I’ve seen nothing worse than Muni right now. The routes are a mess, the buses are late to non-existent; and when they DO show up they are packed to the gills.

A few months ago they inaugurated the T-Line by rerouting every other streetcar line and eliminating the 15; which cut off service to North Beach. The J remains a mess beyond the measurement capabilities of accumulated human knowledge, and don’t even talk to me about the 30, which is impenetrable without battle armor.

Anyway, I made a new shirt.

Written by Mike Monteiro on July 3, 2007 with 0 comments |

The Internet In-Joke Holiday Sale-tacular!**

Just in time for the gift-giving season, we've reduced most* of our stock to just $10! Why? Because we like helping people. And we want to help you give clever, stylish t-shirts to your loved ones and co-workers.

So make your way over to our Feed Store. There, you'll find a perfectly snarky gift for every member of your family.

Happy Festivus!

*All of our squid-related items will remain full price, out of fear of the great Kracken.

**While supplies last.

Written by katiespence on November 29, 2006 |

Web 2.OH, YEAAHH!!

If you're reading this, then you've probably seen Dave's post on last week's kerfluffle. Now bask in the glory that is the definitive Web 2.0 shirt:

Get yours now.

Written by katiespence on May 30, 2006 with 1 comments |

Namaste

"Namaste" is a salutation that's been around for a long time - mostly in India. Until recently - in America - it was a phrase commonly associated with yoga class. Nowadays if you look it up on Wikipedia, under "See also" there are links to Hindu, Buddhism, Greetings and the Hanso Foundation.

If you don't know what the Hanso Foundation is, then you're not watching the right TV show. If you do know what it is, then you should buy this shirt:

Written by katiespence on May 19, 2006 |

Colbert Has Stones, Get Yours Now!

Stephen Colbert, of the "Colbert Report" was asked to speak at the White House Correspondents Dinner last weekend. I'm not sure who made that decision, but I'm really glad they did. Because it meant that President Bush (who was seated about 3 feet from Colbert) and the press-filled audience got to suffer through a mighty fine roasting. Colbert didn't just mock the Commander in Chief, he mocked his entire audience that night, and he did it with style. Not to mention he stayed in character the entire time.

Two of my favorite quotes from the speech:

I believe that the government that governs best is the government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.

and (to the press):

Write that novel you got kickin' around in your head. You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the administration....you know, fiction.

All of the Mules really respect Colbert for his giant stones. We wanted to show our support for him in a visible way. Thus, the Colbert Has Stones tee:

Why don't you pop over to You Tube and watch the video of the speech?

Written by David McCreath on May 1, 2006 with 2 comments |

From Mule Design to You

Say it loud, say it proud, "I <3 GRADIENTS!" Feel no shame in displaying your rounded corners! They're totally popular, thanks to Web 2.0.

Inspired by Heather Armstrong's inventive (ahem) fanmail, we entreat you to "put your sexual picture in your weblog." Because come on. We know you've got lots of sexual pictures just sitting around somewhere on your computer. You might as well put 'em in your weblog.

Written by katiespence on April 14, 2006 |

Webtards ahoy!

We love creating designs that are inspired by our friends. A few months ago, our fellow mule, Alaina Browne, took this picture of internet wunderkinder Jeff and Greg Veen:

Sure, it made us laugh, but it also inspired our latest shirt design. (It also inspired a flickr photo pool, included for your amusement.)

Now that you're in on the in-joke, you should run to the feed store and pick one up!

Written by katiespence on April 4, 2006 |

NARM!

I've been getting lots of squid t-shirts orders as of late, but recently I recieved quite a few orders for our NARM! shirt. Mike and Erika noted that one of the orders was from Matt Shakman, a television director for Six Feet Under. Turns out he directed "Singing for Our Lives" the episode that introduced NARM! into the public discourse.

I contacted him, and he said that although there were many NARM! shirts floating around on the InterWeb, "none compare" to Mule's. Matt is a charmer, but he's also an enabler, because he promised to give one of the shirts he ordered to Scott Buck, the writer of "Singing for Our Lives" and the "true father" of Narm!

This news has made all us Mules giddy, as we are big Six Feet Under fans. Thanks, Matt!

Written by katiespence on February 14, 2006 |